I was checking my email the other night. I have an email in my inbox with no subject and it is from a sender I did not recognize. In my preview window I see that it is Russian, but there is a little ad at the bottom so I assume it is spam and I delete it. I continue on reading the rest of my mail without a second thought. Before closing down for the night I click the delete button on my trash folder but out of no where, I get this thought, DO NOT delete that email Wierd, but I trust my instint. I go into the trash folder look at it again and think this must be spam. In the process I notice that there is a photo attached too but I do not want to risk a virus so I figure I will wait until I translate some of the email first. I go to babblefish, cut and paste the typing and hit translate.
Dear Christina, this is a letter from O and S....sorry it has been a long time without contact. And it goes on briefly to say thank you for the pictures, they are happy for Olena and we are well.
Miss O and Mr. S are Olena's birth parents. I immediately started tearing up and sent the email to Gene for a better translation. I decide to open the photo, nervous and heart pounding, I wait for it to come up on the screen. It was a picture of Miss O. An amazing picture that made me thank God over and over. Just 3 years ago the picture that was taken of this woman was sickly, tired, overworked, poor, and most likely drunk. This picture that came up on the screen was someone who was healthy. Pink cheeks, nice makeup, beautiful hair, sober and "grown up". It made me happy. I don't know any details at this moment and I don't know if I ever will. For all I know, this could have been for the show, but none-the-less she looked alive which wasn't what I seen looking back at me from those last pictures in 2007.
I chose to find Olena's BPs for several reasons. And I have never regretted a moment of that decision. This is Olena's history....Olena's life....her family tree. If she ever needs it or wants it, it's hers. I don't have the heart to say sorry I don't have anything to offer you. No story - no pictures - no nothing. I try to put myself in her shoes as a growing girl, woman, mother, and wife...and I try to think what questions she might have. I try to get those answers - and I try to be prepared.
I also needed to know for myself. I think the reality of remembering she was born to another woman reminds me daily of just how honored I am and how special Olena really is to us. And when I thank God for her every night and I thank the woman who carried her for 9months and cared for her the 1st 6 months of her life....I like "knowing" who she is. I will admit the story and who she was (and maybe still is) was sad. I feared what that might do to Olena. But now years later, I can feel confident that I have something that will make her feel complete, and perhaps maybe a little proud of what her hertiage is.
Keeping in touch with them is something I have also done for the last 3.5 years. From the day Gene sent us their information I have faithfully sent pictures of Olena every year. I translate a few short lines about her and I offer our email address. I never heard from them, I never even knew if they had received my mail. Not until the other day :) It may seem strange to some people why I would offer this information to them and there are so many reasons. I going to chose my words carefully and I will be vague as not to give away too much of Olena's privacy. One, I know for a fact that her BF LOVED her dearly. Two, her BM lead a life as an orphan and was released to no one at the age of 16 - I needed her know that happy endings do exist. Three, because of the story I heard about their lives, I needed them to know that they did do something good in this life. And that was to bring this beautiful little girl into the world. They could have chose to aboard Miss O's pregnancy, but they didn't.
This is obviously not something that all adoptive families feel comfortable doing. But all adoption stories and children's histories are different. For us, this is good and I couldn't be happier. We are truly blessed.
Dear Christina, this is a letter from O and S....sorry it has been a long time without contact. And it goes on briefly to say thank you for the pictures, they are happy for Olena and we are well.
Miss O and Mr. S are Olena's birth parents. I immediately started tearing up and sent the email to Gene for a better translation. I decide to open the photo, nervous and heart pounding, I wait for it to come up on the screen. It was a picture of Miss O. An amazing picture that made me thank God over and over. Just 3 years ago the picture that was taken of this woman was sickly, tired, overworked, poor, and most likely drunk. This picture that came up on the screen was someone who was healthy. Pink cheeks, nice makeup, beautiful hair, sober and "grown up". It made me happy. I don't know any details at this moment and I don't know if I ever will. For all I know, this could have been for the show, but none-the-less she looked alive which wasn't what I seen looking back at me from those last pictures in 2007.
I chose to find Olena's BPs for several reasons. And I have never regretted a moment of that decision. This is Olena's history....Olena's life....her family tree. If she ever needs it or wants it, it's hers. I don't have the heart to say sorry I don't have anything to offer you. No story - no pictures - no nothing. I try to put myself in her shoes as a growing girl, woman, mother, and wife...and I try to think what questions she might have. I try to get those answers - and I try to be prepared.
I also needed to know for myself. I think the reality of remembering she was born to another woman reminds me daily of just how honored I am and how special Olena really is to us. And when I thank God for her every night and I thank the woman who carried her for 9months and cared for her the 1st 6 months of her life....I like "knowing" who she is. I will admit the story and who she was (and maybe still is) was sad. I feared what that might do to Olena. But now years later, I can feel confident that I have something that will make her feel complete, and perhaps maybe a little proud of what her hertiage is.
Keeping in touch with them is something I have also done for the last 3.5 years. From the day Gene sent us their information I have faithfully sent pictures of Olena every year. I translate a few short lines about her and I offer our email address. I never heard from them, I never even knew if they had received my mail. Not until the other day :) It may seem strange to some people why I would offer this information to them and there are so many reasons. I going to chose my words carefully and I will be vague as not to give away too much of Olena's privacy. One, I know for a fact that her BF LOVED her dearly. Two, her BM lead a life as an orphan and was released to no one at the age of 16 - I needed her know that happy endings do exist. Three, because of the story I heard about their lives, I needed them to know that they did do something good in this life. And that was to bring this beautiful little girl into the world. They could have chose to aboard Miss O's pregnancy, but they didn't.
This is obviously not something that all adoptive families feel comfortable doing. But all adoption stories and children's histories are different. For us, this is good and I couldn't be happier. We are truly blessed.
Comments
What a blessing for you and Olena!